Parents and Teens

Quote of the day:
“There’s an overwhelmingly positive relationship between parents and young people.”
--Radha Subramanyam, vice president for research and planning, MTV Networks Kids and Family Group.

Quote of the day no. 2:
“Well, it’s not so bad. After all, I did the same thing when I was his age.”
--An anonymous parent of a teenager using drugs.

The first statement comes out of a survey of 1,000 teens conducted by MTV (reported in today’s Barron’s). The poll showed that parents have the most influence of anyone in a teen’s choice of a cellphone, computer, internet provider and home-entertainment system.

Radha Subramanyam (quoted above) says that boomer’s kids see their parents as both role models and “best friends.”

Their teens rank them a close second to music in answer to the question “What most defines you?”

In the other direction, parents rely heavily on the advice of their 13-to-19-year-olds when they buy cars or pick where to travel.

The second statement above (“I did the same thing when I was his age”) belies a desire to hold a teenager to our lowest standard of behavior. That logic comes out of my own childhood. I used it when, to defend something I did, I said to my mother, “Well, Johnny did it.” My mother said, “If Johnny jumped off the Brooklyn Bridge, would you do that, too?”

In summary, just because you did something when you were his age, it is not automatically OK that your teenager does it.